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dangerbunny does texas |
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8 Minute Dating - One Person's Account
Well, driving out to the Cool River Café my belly was doing flip flips. I didn't really understand this because I had no reason to be nervous. I tried talking my belly into being calm but it didn't work. Perhaps I was just hungry.
So I make it to Cool River Café and I'm straight up pimp'n. I've got my black Dickies cargo pants on -- with wallet chain, of course. I also have on my shiny black shirt with tribal images in silver on front and back. Yeah, it looks good, or at least fits my style. Man this place is a Yuppie-Ville. It's like going into a Dockers' convention. Oh well, I'm sure my dates won't forget me.
I make sure I'm not late for the sign up then promptly make way to the bar. If I remember the advice given by my Fried Chicken (an email joke list) (kin to the drunk monkeys list - ed.) friends correctly I was to have a beverage and relax. So I wait at the bar for one of the bartenders to get me a beer, and I wait. Some girl comes up to the bar next to me also waiting for a beverage. We wait. She says to me, "Come here often?" Hahahahaaha! Oh my, I think, I know why you are here. Actually I don't even react like that ‘cause I'm still nervous, and kind of embarrassed. I tell her ‘No, my first time.' She doesn't stop talking; she seems to be wired on coffee orsomething. Yeah she needs a strong drink to mellow out, too. Minor chit-chat leads to the truth of why I'm there and she blurts out, "me too." Yeah, we both chuckle. Wow -- we already are making friends and it hasn't even started. I pray that I don't have an 8 minute date with her.
I order up an Anchor Steam. A wonderful beer brewed in San Francisco. I figure any respectable yuppie bar should have this on tap. Nope they don't, so I figure it's time for attitude number two. "I will have an Arrogant Bastard Ale, please." They have that on tap. Now the party begins.
I take my tasty cold adult beverage and wait in line with my new umm-friend. I will call her Angel. She says that's her name anyway. We are waiting to sign in with the organizers to receive our "Hello my name is......" sticker and some info on how this speed dating works. Angel really likes to talk. She is making friends with everyone in the line around her. I think she may be too aggressive. Angel introduces me to the girl in line behind us. Her name is Jessica. She is not my style either. Jessica is a quiet one, but with Angel prompting her she opens up. I hope I don't have a date with Jessica either. I have met two new girls tonight and both are not for me. I'm not so sure if this is going to be a successful evening.
Good -- I now get my nametag and number. "Hello my name is.....Rand 212." Yes, I am more then just a name now. I'm a number also. Everybody has a name and number now. Some people I notice have little blue pieces of tape on their name thing. I wonder why.
The area is set up with tables and on these tables are numbers. There are two chairs next to each number. I feel I'm beginning to see how this works, but how do I know where to start? Where do I go? Someone shows me on my paperwork my date order. Date 1 table 8, date 2 table 40, date 3 table 13, and date 4 table 28. Then it's break time then back to dating madness. Date 5 table 23, date 6 table 48......yeah, you get the idea.
Hey, I see someone I know. It's a friend of mine, Mark, from the mountain biking group, Church of the Knobby Tire. He is kicking with a couple of people he knows -- some guy who looks like Batman in plain clothes, but not as cool, and another yuppyish IBM type. I wish them luck, but then again there seem to be girls here more their style. We kick it and talk about how we found out about this. It seems like everyone seems to have gotten "the email" and everyone knows this Julia person (or at least knows somebody who knows her).
(Note I am changing the first names
and am changing their numbers to protect the innocent)(If you can call
them that)(Okay Rand, what ever)(I may be crazy, because I answer myself
even in email)
Off in the distance a bell rings. Through years of public schooling I
know this means that I must make my way to my first date. I go to Table
8. My date isn't there yet. I see another couple of other guys hanging
by their tables waiting for number one. I hope my date shows -- it would
suck to be stood up on this.
Through conversation with the peeps waiting around me, I discovered that the blue sticker means you have a date at Table 1. (So, Rand, what the hell is so special about Table 1?) Well my friends, dates that happen at Table 1 are filmed. It's a truly cozy table in the corner with bright spotlights to really make you feel natural. What I thought was a nice touch was the tall bush behind the table with the microphone coming out of it most phallic-like. So pleased am I that I am not at Table 1.
Okay, my date arrives. I will call her, "Reba 628." We introduce ourselves, "Hi I'm Rand 212." Yeah, you see the routine. Reba 628 is not physically what I'm looking for. Hey, I'm just being honest, and I have seven more dates to find my love. We write each other's names on our score sheets. The score sheets have places for names, reminders, respectful (yes/no), I would contact this person for (dating/friendship/business). Also on the back are conversation topics (I didn't notice these till the end of the night). We hear the bell toll twice and we know it's time to begin dating. Wait, both of us require drink to keep our pallets moist for all this talking to be done. She orders a captain and coke, and I quietly order my Arrogant Bastard Ale. She laughs at my beer choice and the ice has been broken. We talk the whole 8 minutes and time seems to have flown by. She is a wild party white trash girl. I could party with her, hang with her, and if I got drunk enough I would be sorry I woke up with her. Still, a real good time, I am glad I am here. I've met three single women who I'm not attracted to. Anyway, for reminders I put in Pakistan. Apparently she traveled their last year on a business trip. Reba 628 is a very interesting person.
Date 2 Table 40. I get to the table and there is an almost empty glass of wine, a fork, and someone's paperwork. What does it all mean? I'm not sure. I think Date 2 has been here, but I can't tell which seat she has chosen, so I randomly pick a seat. Date 2 arrives shortly there after -- we will call her "Leanne 640." We do the customary greeting and write each other's names down. The bell tolls and the dating begins. Leanne 640 is attractive and is wearing leather pants. There is attitude coming off her. She sits in her chair almost slouching, and legs slightly spread. I can see she is starting this date very defensive. This date may not go as smoothly as the last one. We talk -- I ask her question and am able to get her to open up. I remember more Fried Chicken advice, and am very intent upon my date. I keep eye contact and smile a lot. I want her to know I'm having fun and she should relax. It turns out she used to live in NY and as she put it "outgrew the city." I say, "How can you outgrow NY?" Turns out it had something to do with family. Anyway Leanne 640 used to design clothing, and likes to ski. She is very cool. I'm not feeling match, but she is very interesting. She is hoping to start designing fashion here soon. I wish her luck. The bell tolls and it's time to move on. So far these 8 minute dates have flown by. I'm feeling real good about all of this.
Date 3 Table 13. My lucky number this
has got to be a good one. As I arrive at Table 13 my date is already there.
She starts the conversation off before I even sit with, "Your shirt
is too shiny." I think to myself, "and you are too fat. I can
at least change my shirt." Yeah, I was a bit pissed by her comment.
No wonder she is single. Fuck, I have to spend 8 minutes with her. This
one is going to drag. Fuck it -- I will make the best of a bad date. We
talk and it turns out she has been in the high tech industry for 12 years
and has never been laid off. She claims she knows when to bail out. Whatever.
We talk about brewing beer. I speak of my beer Smoking Monkey, and she
betters my name with Screaming Anus. A beer her friend has brewed. Damn
fucking bell, ring already. Eventually it does and I'm free. Oh yeah,
that was "Dora 601" She sucks. I pity her next day, her previous
date, and everyone else who has to associate with her.
Date 4 Table 28. My date arrives and she is hot! Wow, now this is what
I'm here for. Blond, wonderful figure, dressed well, beautiful smile.
Her name is "Erin 609." She seems to appreciate my appearance
or so I think. Conversation with her is easy, and I'm starting to get
buzzed. She has never been skiing or snowboarding. I want to take her
with me on my next trip. Yes, she would make a wonderful snow bunny. She
is stupid. I know I can appreciate her for a week or two. Okay, Shallow
Rand 212 coming out. Oh well, perhaps there is more to her that I didn't
get in 8 minutes. I would love to find out. She gets good remarks on my
score card.
Break time happens and Erin 609 is looking for her friend. She asks if I came here with anyone. I say no and she invites me to hang out with her and her friend during break. Sure, why not, this is cheap entertainment. I'm hanging out when a lovely lady who appears to be part of the staff approaches me. She asks if I would mind being interviewed on camera for a documentary thing. Oh yeah, I'm buzzed and I love being on film. Both women running the camera and sound are hot. I'm buzzed. I'm asked if I'm having a good time. I'm all smiles. Yes, I am. Have I met anyone I'm interested in? Yes, I am. Is there anyone here you would like to have sex with? Smile gets bigger. Sound girl points to camera girl. Yes, I do. I think my replies were longer but that is the gist of it.
Finish break out by ordering one more Arrogant Bastard Ale.
Waitress knows my beer before I say it. She is good.
Date 5 Table 23. I'm stood up! WTF!! How can this be? Oh well apparently some other girl at table 3 was stood up to. We are set up together. Her name is "Rachel 625". Nothing really special about her, I still like Erin 609. Rachel 625 thinks I'm the guy she was supposed to be with and scolds me for being late. I put her in her place and tell her she was stood up like me. Take that! I must give kudos to the organizer for setting the stood up people together. The 8 minutes with Rachel 625 was cool. I'm not really interested; I like the dumb blond.
Date 6 Table 48. Mary 620. Didn't take any notes on her. Wasn't really into her style but the 8 minutes seemed to fly by. Conversation was good. I think she was a high school teacher. She teaches Texas history. I can tell she is a party girl too.
Date 7 Table 41. Karen 611. Wow, this girl is very attractive. She is blond, and in good shape. Seems to be dressed very conservatively, and I find her sexy. We talk about jobs and California and stuff. Turns out she is a lawyer for some big company. She makes sure people don't sue company for sexual harassment and stuff like that. Sounds like an over paid HR person. I like her a lot. Time with her flies by. She tells me she really likes me, but she...........has a boyfriend. Fuck, this is no good. Why is she here? She claims she came here with friends. She says she wants to be friends with me cause I'm really cool. It figures, the one I'm attracted to for real is already taken. Isn't that just the fucking way? She checks the ‘friends' box on her score sheet and shows me she has no notes on anyone else and really does want to be my friend. Yes I would like to be her friend also. *sigh* I check my friend box for her. I really hope we can be friends.
Date 8 Table 41. Yeah, I don't have to move!!! I feel all badass and important now. Now I meet "Theresa 652". Theresa 652 looks like a rugged girl. Face weather beaten, but has some stunning eyes. Too bad she didn't take better care of her skin. She looks older then she is. Theresa 652 lives on a farm and is a sculptor. Conversation flows but my steam has been let out a bit by my last dating disappointment. Theresa 652 is cool. I can tell by the end of the date she is into me. I kept my charm up even though I didn't feel it.
The final bell tolls; it's over. This kicked ass! I can't wait to do this again!!!! I could have hung out and talked more with people but I was buzzed and tired of mingling.
Today I went to www.8minutedating.com and filled my score card. Basically just put that I would like to be friends with Laura 641, and would like to date Erin 609. I really hope I hear from Karen 611. She is cool. I should know in 48 hours whether either of these two girls feels the same way.Rand 212
